Cleansing myself

Last night I went to sleep feeling optimistic and today I woke up the same way and that’s something pretty weird in me, let me say. I guess after hearing a lot of people, and I mean, really listening to them, carefully I realized that if I want to be happy I have to put off some things for a little while in order to focus on things that are more approachable to accomplish in my present right now.
I was busy, and believe that this was for a long time, thinking about the things that I didn’t have and I really wish I could have. That strong desire of being there, or having that instead of being here and enjoying this prevented me from feeling the NOW.
It’s crazy to think of all the things that I didn’t, (and still I don’t, I’m still learning how to) appreciate because I was worried about all the things I didn’t have.
My head works in a strange way that I can’t totally understand but I can’t do anything but take it as it is and keep trying to figure it out.
As a way to keep myself on the ground and stop flying around in the nonsense I gave up on those things that were out of sight for the moment. I guess that book I read weeks ago has started to have an effect on me finally. You have to dispose certain shit of your past and also from the present in order to clear your mind and start again with a brand new mindset.
It hurts, at least to me, to get rid of those “not right now” things, because for me, putting off things, due to how anxious I am, it means that are not possible, and I came to realize that I was quite wrong about that. It’s hard for me to postpone and don’t do it, or even worse, not being able to do it right away, but as I’m learning life won’t always give you birds and rainbows all the time, sometimes you have to suck it up, just like that.
I’m learning to do what I never thought I would be doing: Embracing the present and letting go things that are not useful for me. I can’t promise anything, all I can promise is that I’m trying and I’m anxious (couldn’t resist) to see the results of this new mental chapter.

PS: Don’t take too long, plz.